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Wits of Wisdom

Just some of my favorite words of wisdom from everyone….

“Women will never be as successful as men because they have no wives to advise them.” ~Dick Van Dyke.

“If you don’t like your job, you don’t strike! You just go in every day, and do it really half assed. That’s the American way.” ~Homer

“The large print giveth, but the small print taketh away.”  ~Tom Waits

“There are 3 kinds of people in this world… those that can count…. and those that can’t.”

“The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. “

“You grow up the day you have your first real laugh – at yourself.”

“You have a right to your opinions. I just don’t want to hear them.”

“You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 today and we don’t know where the hell she is.” ~Ellen Degeneres

“You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” ~Robin Williams

“There is no elevator to success. You have to take the stairs.”

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” ~Thomas Edison.

“A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just have one thing to say to the authors of that study: Duh.” ~Conan O’Brien

“The main thing is keeping the main thing the main thing.”

“Never play leap-frog with a unicorn” …. ouch!!!!

“Have no fear of perfection–you’ll never reach it.” ~Salvador Dali

“When you’re in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, ‘Damn, that was fun.'”

“The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.”  ~Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes

“You can’t have everything… where would you put it?”  ~Steven Wright

“Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.” ~Homer Simpson

“Plastic surgeons are always making mountains out of molehills.” ~Dolly Parton

“Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.”

“A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.”

“I plan on living forever.  So far, so good.”

“There are two different kinds of people in this world: those who finish what they start, and”



IF~

If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach a man how to fish, you ruin a wonderful business opportunity.

If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

If you win, you will be happy; if you lose, you will be wise. … If one is forever cautious, can one remain a human being?

If you want to succeed sooner, double your failure rate.

If you can dish it, make sure you can take it.

If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it ’til it is.

If you’re not living on the edge, you’re taking up too much space.

If in doubt, throw it out (my nutritionist’s rule for food).

If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.

If you fall seven times, get up eight.

If anything can go wrong, it probably will (Murphy’s Law), have a backup plan ready.

If they can do it, so can you! The only difference is your desire and drive to do so.

If a picture paints a thousand words, then why can’t I paint you….?

If you don’t know – ASK. Now you know.

If you can’t beat ’em, don’t stop trying ’til you do.

If it rains, it pours, but don’t forget about the rainbow soon after.

If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in the dark with a mosquito.

If something’s beyond your control, why worry about it?

If you want to look young and thin, hang around old fat people.

If someone else messed up, pretend you didn’t notice.

If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.

If you wish to make a man your enemy, tell him simply, “You are wrong.” This method works every time.

If you can do something today, do it today!

If you fear dying, then you’re already dead.

“If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we’re apart… I’ll always be with you.” – Winnie the Pooh Bear

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Ultimate Signs you were FreindZoned

Funny topic on The Wake Up Show today! We started talking about signs you’re in the FriendZone!

It got funny when we also started talking about the local version, which we dubbed as #kuyazoned. Check out some funny responses on Twitter with that #kuyazoned hashtag.

Here are some of our favorite pics from all over the web on the Ultimate Signs you were FriendZoned!

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Vince Golangco & Tim Tayag give advice on safety in the Philippines

Two very strategic and smart ways to avoid being kidnapped in the Philippines.

Check out these in-depth strategies from experts such as Tim Tayag, of the Comedy Cartel and from the WhenInManila.com team.

Some similarities to the strategies, but both very effective!

Don’t be a victim of senseless kidnapping in third world countries!

BE INFORMED!

Full video, pics, info and post on our official site – WhenInManila.com


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George Carlin’s Views on Aging

George Carlin on age.
(Absolutely Brilliant)
IF YOU DON’T READ THIS TO THE VERY END, YOU HAVE LOST A DAY IN YOUR LIFE. AND WHEN YOU HAVE FINISHED, DO AS I AM DOING AND SEND IT ON.
George Carlin’s Views on Aging
Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions.
‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m four and a half!’ You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key .
You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.
‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m gonna be 16!’ You could be 13, but hey, you’re gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!
But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now, you’re Just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed?
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it’s all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.
But wait!!! You < SPAN style=”FONT-WEIGHT: bold”>MAKE it to 60. You didn’t think you would!
So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.
You’ve built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it’s a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!
You get into your 80’s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30 ; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn’t end there. Into the 90s, you start going backw ards; ‘I Was JUST 92.’
Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. ‘I’m 100 and a half!’
May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!
HOW TO STAY YOUNG
1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay ‘them.’
2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.
3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. ‘An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.’ And the devil’s name is Alzheimer’s.
4. Enjoy the simple things.
5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.
6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.
7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.
8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.
9. Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.
10.Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.
AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,but by the moments that take our breath away.
And if you don’t send this to at least 8 people – who cares? But do share this with someone. We all need to live life to its fullest each day!!
**********************************************************************
Gas prices getting you down? Search AOL Autos for fuel-efficient used cars.
Live your life, with nothing to lose
Whatever you want, whenever you choose
Make a difference, help out
Give some time to those without
Take risks, love, dance and thrive
Enjoy this time we are alive!.

Thoughts from the late, great, absolutely brilliant,George Carlin.

George Carlin on age.

Obit-George-Carlin-on-aging-age-funny

George Carlin’s Views on Aging

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we’re kids? If you’re less than 10 years old, you’re so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m four and a half!’ You’re never thirty-six and a half. You’re four and a half, going on five! That’s the key .

You get into your teens, now they can’t hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

‘How old are you?’ ‘I’m gonna be 16!’ You could be 13, but hey, you’re gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . . You become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There’s no fun now, you’re Just a sour-dumpling. What’s wrong? What’s changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you’re PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it’s all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn’t think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You’ve built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it’s a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80’s and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30 ; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn’t end there. Into the 90s, you start going backw ards; ‘I Was JUST 92.’

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. ‘I’m 100 and a half!’

May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!

Aging_and_Belt_Height

And for more tips on staying young – How To Stay Forever Young

Asking the Right Questions

Random Person: “So what do you do?”

Vince: “I do a lot, but mostly I’m a creative writer and a travel blogger.”

Random Person: “Oh… so how do you make money with that?”

Vince: “Ummm… lots of ways. What do you do?”

Random Person: “I’m an accountant.”

Vince: “Oh… so how do you have fun with that…?”

Random Person: ” …… “


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VS

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How To Start Your Personal Blog

Here’s a video of Hannah Villasis, author of the blog FlairCandy.com. Hannah won the 2009 award for “Best Personal Blog” at the Digital Filipino E-Commerce summit (DigitalFilipino.com) held at the Intercontinental Hotel. FlairCandy gives us a brief talk on how to successfully start your own personal blog

Some highlights from Hannah’s talk:

  • Put yourself into the blog
  • Be just who you are
  • You are your own personal brand
  • Your own personal brand will connect with others like you and that will be your niche
  • You can be funny, crazy, goofy, sexy or whatever, your readers will relate to you if its you
  • If you want to communicate to your audience, it’s no longer about the super models, it’s about just you and me, the personal bloggers

Check out more of Hannah at her site FlairCandy.com or I recommend you follow her on Twitter at Twitter.com/FlairCandy.

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Check out more of Hannah at her site FlairCandy.com or I recommend you follow her on Twitter atTwitter.com/FlairCandy.

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